| George Best | For being better than Pele and Maradonna |
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| Thierry Henry | For not only being better than Pele and Maradona but for looking cool as fuck as he's doing it. |
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| George Best | George Best was the greatest player ever because A) he didn''t need a world cup to show how great he was B) he never needed to cheat C) he did all that whilst pissed. |
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| Terry Hurlock | The man is a fucking legend - nay, a God amongst legendary Gods. How the Savages/Bellamys/Bowyers/Cisses of this world could do with a bit of Hurlock-style justice. None of this cheeky little sniping of the ankles for Tel. Oh, no. Straight forward, honest to goodness ABH for him. No fucking about. In fact, anyone who was going to football before it got taken over by Sky in the 90s and sanitised by facepaint wearing Guardian readers in Euro-96 should club together to fund the research into having Hurlock cloned and let loose on the overpaid, spit roasting mincers that care more for their image rights than the game itself these days. Also, when asked by Tony Cascarino how hard he was, Hurlock ripped off the door from the pub they were drinking in with his bare hands. You know, just to make his point.
Sacred cow? You gonna tell him he's not? Right, on he goes then. |
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| Besty | For being better than Pele or Maradona |
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| Pele | For being better than Maradona. |
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| Diego Armando Maradona | Where do you fucking start, the greatest player to have ever kicked a football, single handedly won a world cup (excuse the pun) who gives a monkeys about the hand of god his other goal was worth ten, also won 2 serie A titles and the UEFA cup with Napoli, who''d won fuck all before that, whilst off his nut on coke, not to mention shooting a load of reporters that were outside his house with a pellet gun
The man is a fucking legend, i dare any of you cunts to say Pelé or Besty were better than him
El Diego i fucking salute you |
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| Jimmy White | Got pissed, did drugs, fucked whores, survived cancer, won everything apart from the World Championship and didn''t give a fuck. Jimmy, we salute you. |
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| Lance Armstrong | he winds up the French by winning their most cherished event seven times and not getting done once for doping. anything that winds up the French is good. |
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| Bobby Robson | The man that no one can speak ill of. Apart from Craig Bellamy. Who is a total cockhead |
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